Well...Whaddya Know?

I've finished my Xmas shopping by the 23rd of December.

See, miracles can happen at Christmastime.

I've also got some cash left.

Think I'll treat myself to a pint of milk.

Line my stomach, ready.

Sergei

Populist #2

Here's another one...

Human
League
Gentlemen
Ladies
Ascot
Hats
Coats
Winter
Coal
Port
Starboard
Green
Pleasant
Pheasant
Turkey
Christmas

Sergei

Populist #1

In the manner of word association, I'm just going to write whatever comes into my head - as fast as I can, and without trying to influence my thoughts. Ready? Deep breath...

Bach's Toccata and Fugue
Music lessons
Piano
Lost skill
Sadness
Fingers
Nails
Cut
Rattle on keyboard
Grubby keyboard
replace kit
peripheral
vision
night goggles
see-through
nightie
teddy
cuddle
furry
warm
sleep

Ok. See where my mind goes when I let go of it's hand, metaphorically speaking?

Sergei

Welcome to the Production Support Group's Xmas Party 2005...

West End Girls..................................and East End Girls...
No prizes for guessing that we ended up in Leicester Square...

Damn Fire's Gone Out Again...

David "Davey Dave" Cameron is the new leader then. Anthony "Tony Tone" Blair is the elder stateman. Charles "Where's the Bar" Kennedy now looks old and frumpy. Know what? I reckon that Boris Johnson is the man for the job. I'm not sure exactly what job that may be, b-b-b-but I'm certain he'll be good at it.

All in all then, Authority's gone to the dogs, but realised that Walthamstow isn't what it used to be. That's where all your tax has gone then...kenneling fees.

Annual appraisal time is just around the corner - just past the Circus Tent and near the Clown's caravan. You'll find our Director there, in the Stocks, with the other Directors throwing wet sponges at him. I've got some housebricks ready, just waiting under my desk. Take That. There's still no F in Money. Mutiny hangs heavily in the air, but we are just waiting for him to sign off our Christmas Meal expense sheet first.

Merry Christmas - my A**e.

And it's not often I wish my a**e merry Christmas either.

Or kiss it under the mistletoe.

Cross My Palms with Silver To See Your Future

I have recently been offered a look into the future. Everything seems reasonably rosy, but I don't necessarily want it to be.

Sitting in a very comfortable leatherette armchair last week, I felt the wind of change blowing through.

Where I was, it is the only place on earth where one can easily see directly into one's own near forthcomings. Or even possibly shortcomings.

I looked into the large mirror in front of me, and saw myself ageing rapidly. As the months came off, the years piled on.

I spoke softly, and was answered with a minute buzzing in my ear.

I asked for a number four all over.

And was advised that I really shouldn't do that unles I'm considering joining Holy Orders at the nearest Monastery.

As the hair became shorter, I saw the ancestry of the human race slowly being uncovered. I began to look like a chimp. Ok, Ok - even more like a chimp than usual.

Oh well.

Hair today, Goon tomorrow.

Samson, I know how you felt.

Sergei